I was so used to feeling embarrassed when it comes to writing. I had always felt like I was never good enough to write a good piece of writing. And it was almost like an obsession for any ambitious writer to produce a piece that could touch the deepest trench of a heart. Not me though.

I can admit from the bottom of my heart that I was never a poetic one. For the longest time ever, the words that manifested from my tappings on the keyboard had always been very "rational," I would say. And I was proud of them. I was.

Then something happened in me. Happened due to me. There came a burst of realisation that perhaps the rationality that I had been grasping for the entire of my life was actually the reflection of my lack of emotional presence. And now they have all devoured me, drowning me in the tides of overwhelming emotions. My soul was dying of the suffocation from love and acceptance back then, and once it got a taste of them, it would not stop asking for more now.

Since then, I have been writing every single thought of mine, no matter how trivial they are. Each of the emotions that I have been experiencing, I thank them for showing up in my head, for making me feel human like I had never been before. Every instance worth remembering that appears in front of my eyes, I take photos of them. Every word and sentence, no matter what they speak of, I savour them over and over again in my head. Every feeling emerging out of nowhere, I accept it as it is.

I still feel embarrassed when it comes to writing. I still feel like I am not enough to write a good piece of writing. But it does not stop me from writing. And I think, writing with the knowledge that our work will never be perfect can be the gentle motivation to keep us writing.